Heaven & Hell Alleycat

Movember 1, 8:00

$5 and a pen will get you started.  Lights would be a great idea.

A 3 minute time deduction if you have a shaved upper lip.

A 9 minute time deduction if you have a shaved upper lip and your name is Albert, James or PW.

BYOB to ABES headquarters and I’ll tote it to your final resting place.

Our father,

who rides in heaven,

hollow be thy frame.

Thy links' cogs run. 

Thy wheel be done on earth,

as it is in bicycle heaven.

Give us this day our steely thread. 

And forgive us our dents, 

as we forgive our denters. 

So why not lead us into temptation, 

as long as you're delivering us from evil:

for thine is the kingdom,

and the pedal power, 

and the chrome-plated glory, forever. 

AMEN

Camp Cross Photo Files

Camp Cross had all the campy fun I've come to expect from RRR/DRRR.  The course was great, the weather cooperated and the vibe was crossy-goodness.  Cheryl took a boatload of pictures.  Here's what you missed...

  

ThNR Report

Steven, Shaun, Gavin, James, Tom, PW, Franklin, Mike, Duke and I met for a bike ride and some giggles.  We cycled around for a while.  My camera dropped on the road and was nearly run over by two semis.  We regathered in the village.  Then it snowed and we biked to get hydrated.  It was a fine ride.  Rev. Dan joined us briefly at the clubhouse to unwind after his last ever fall concert at WC Miller.  Minutes include: James was encouraged to blog about his Fall Supper Tour and include a helmet-cam to capture the buffet and awkward line-up conversations, drainage in Altona options – Build last V Come and get me, PW and Tam provide bags of the best homemade jerky I’ve ever had: beef, pork and venison - delish, Mike is not re-shingling ABES headquarters and is moving on to greener pastures - maybe I’ll hire the summer teacher crew - A+ Roofing, Halloween V Fall Festival = devil candy V wholesome candy, creeper David has some hot-cross-balls, Karaoke on Thursday night is bunk, everybody wants an alleycat race but…, LieStrong still won because he beat all the other cheaters, cross-bikes for kids, parking trailers in tight spots (twss), Myron noted that the best thing about comb-overs is that nobody notices, Curt has jumped the Friesens ship and landed on the Zacharias Electric train, tattoo stubble hairlines, future pathways in/out of Altona, Albert drove back from Moab for choir practice – then drove back for more biking, Franklin is sniffing out a new bike and plans to get a race license next year – double sweet, how do you politely and cleverly say “mind your own bloody business!”?, and it was agreed that ABES participate in the Movember challenge – a cleanly shaved lip is required next week if you want to get in on the hairy funtest.

Curt at BAC helps a brother with a late night repair

My Opus loved the rubber mallet TLC

Next Week I'm organizing the Heaven and Hell Alleycat.  5 bucks and a pen is all you need.  JS

ThNR

Let's go for a sniff.  

I get to ride my singie speed.  

See you at 8:00

Southern Cross Photo Dump II - updated

I received these pretty pictures from my co-worker Elizabeth Loewen, a lucky sister of local legend and provincial cyclocross champion Albert falk.  Here are a few that make me happy...

Willow Ringer - the Cute Factor is off the charts

Dave Unger (also cute) finds his muse from David and Cindy 

Free beer makes me happy too!

Update: All of her pictures have now been added to the slide show...

Thanks Betty.  

JS

Albert Falk - Provincial Cyclocross Champion!

The Provincial cyclocross championships were held yesterday and the course was the best it’s ever been at “historic Whittier Park” (Steve Scoles).  Here’s how the locals fared:  Albert Falk won the gold medal (for his age group) – we heart you Albert, Sweet Cheryl Koop raced to a bronze, Genevieve won the Open race, Gavin put on an impressive show and finished just off the podium in the one-hour race, Lisa showed that training and a good diet actually make a difference (stupid training and diet - you suck), Dan looked strong in the Open race and may have caught the Cross-bug, David took a leisurely approach and was Athena-slapped by Cindy, Joanne and Sandra, Steven had a good race with David Unger but ran out of gas, DB continues to get stronger after he figured out how to not pass-out at races, Mia and Kate finished strong and were mostly smiling, and Thomas has been getting better every race and finished first in the kids race – woo-hoo!  I on the other hand could nary finish a lap.  Of my three races at Whitter, I have crashed once and broken my derraileur twices.  Sheesh!  I need to fire my mechanic. 

Cheryl took these pics before our camera died.  The rest can be found at the usual sites.

Kate impressed me by getting out of her saddle and pushing hard

Pre-race jitters?

Kate did great  

Thomas races past Mia

Sandra enjoying the weather

Lisa and Joanne

Anita and Cindy

David and Dan

There were also top-notch dogs and condiments - seriously tasty.  Thanks for the good times FOG.

Hot Cross Buns

Scroll down a few..recognize this Cross hottie?

http://cyclocrosshotties.tumblr.com/

ThNR Report

Ben, Duke, Franklin, Dan, and James thought it was a good idea to bike in the rain and 60 km/h winds and found the fortitude to ride one soggy lap around town.  David, Tom, Steve and I did not find fortitude but we did find comfort in our warm and dry socks.  After the split, we reconvened at the clubhouse where the fail of the night started and ended with karaoke.  Bad music is manageable if the volume is low enough to visit, but the volume was loud and the singing ranged from bearable to terrible so we took refuge in our alternative clubhouse – Duke’s garage.  Minutes include: cardboard bikes, Tom shared a couple of bags of jerky and promised to deliver his homemade variety once he pounds his meat, I was contacted by the MCA this week and was asked to return my award for Manitoba’s Best Male Cyclist – congratulations J/Don Sawatzky, James was celebrating his birthday and was pleased that his beloved Tigers swept his hated Yankees, in 2007 SC had the biggest cyclocross race with 58 racers, "This song is dedicated to the binders of ladies", Dan got rid of 5 bikes this year, y'all should RSVP Franklin if you want to attend his mountain-cross race and supper on November 11 – everybody is invited, Elliot auditions for ET, SRAM has the (zombie) double-tap, SC makes the front page in The Echo, Tom stayed for a Bud, Pukatawagon stylings: Cotton-eyed Joe, Altoooona, and Porky Pig, Low German words to Enter Sandman and the theme songs to Spiderman and The Beverly Hillbillies, the War of 1812 song, Julia was riding the Surly Cross-Chuck at SC, I was called an uber-biker on CFAM and Johnny Slowatsky by my “friends”.  Good times.   

ThNR

Southern Cross is still fresh in our minds so there will be stories of pain, suffering and deliverance.  And there will be rain.  We might even ride our bikes.  See you at 8.

Southern Cross Lost but Found

You have 10 days to claim these before you can find them at the local MCC store...

Southern Cross Report

What a beautiful day for a cross race!  221 223 racers got together to suffer, smile and get muddy at our humble Southern Cross and everything seemed to come up roses.  Minutes from the big day include:  Sandra D and the registration angels made the waiver/reg process such a pain-free experience that Colin didn't swear once - not an easy task, 42 Open racers and 79 kids raced = wicked awesome, the incredible set-up and clean-up crew kicked ass, fans cheering and giving the racers a lot of love was a beautiful thing, race announcer Steve Scoles adding a new and exciting dimension for racers and fans while braving his fear of heights and personalizing our race with The Pioneer Meat Grinder - the A race as The Sunflower Rush Hour - and the mis-named Johnny S Six-Pack (does 6-pack = keg?), The kids bike as a prize was a nice draw, the supportive businesses were appreciated, the mud pit worked out much better than we imagined, the course layout was challenging, creative and received rave reviews, Saskatchewan ABES chapter Ian Loepky enjoyed his first bike race ever, David Unger raced with one pedal - shitty yet inspirational, Willow Ringer racing on her pushbike and wearing a tutu was as cute as it gets, beer coupons were appreciated, watching people bunny-hop barriers is super cool, James Doell fixing Brads truck = beard buddies, SC miracle: having an unprecedented 221 223 racers and NOT running out of food, Pioneer Meat printed the ABES logo on the sausage links packages - nice touch Scott, donating baskets of food to the local food bank is good m'kay, BAC tweaking bikes before the races was an unexpected treat, Shaun smoking as he rode with the kids race made me howl, David Coughlin chugging his vase of beer made everybody at the ACC cheer, and Tom's post race party cheeseburgers were brilliant.  Good times everybody.  

Albert took these...

A boatload of mud splattered, gritty and pained pictures have popping up around the interwebs.  Check these sites for more SC memories...

Rod Colwell

Stefen Isfeld

Wookcock Cycle

Mark Reimer

And an online news report thanks to Pembina Valley Online

We should do that again next year.

Southern Cross Results 2012

Southern Cross 2012 was a huge success!  Thanks to everyone who came out and raced, cheer and volunteered!  There were 220 races this year.

Results can be found here.  There have been some corrections made since the first draft.  Let us know if there are any more.
There is also a PDF at the bottom of the Southern Cross site to download.

Southern Cross Course

Here's the view from the race announcers perch.  From this vantage point he'll witness riders digging deep into the suitcase of pain on the barriers, sandpit, start/finish and spiral.  Yee-haw!

ThNR Report and SC News

James, Curt, Mike, Shaun, Gavin, Franklin, Steve, Steven, Duke and I rode a race pace around town.  People are definitely getting faster and I am slowing down.  I hate you guys.  People dropped off until only Franklin and Gavin remained; did I mention I hate you guys.  We met at the clubhouse where I cooled down and we were joined by Tom, Jeff and Albert.  Minutes included: Catchy tunes, Frank’s hot-sauce on our popcorn was a tasty treat, $70,000 hipster bikes, Tom likes the idea of camouflage barriers, this time Joey is not OK, Albert was suckered by Dan to attend a fundraiser, Franklin is eyeing a new cross bike, unique school cancellation – sniper day, the Jonathan Toews commercial, Mike is going to re-shingle ABES headquarters, and I sold Grey Cup raffle tickets that were AGAINST (not for) kids with cancer.  Good times.

Is Steve ready for Southern Cross?  Word.

The Southern Cross weekend is finally here and I’m sounding the siren to mobilize the ABES army.  Meet at the park Saturday morning at 9:00 to start marking the course.  The more the merrier.  

The Southern Cross hype machine has been busy whirring away and includes an article in The Echo, a CFAM interview, 1000+ school flyers, SWiebo's posters, and signage at the Civic Centre and Canadian Lumber. 

Hear Ye!  Hear Ye!

Dwight loves cycling but hates spelling.
We still appreciate the props.

Early (cheap) registration closes on Saturday at midnight so get to it and pre-register here!

Thursday Night Cross Lab and Ride

Cross Lab - Meet at the park at 6:30.  We'll practice riding the railway ties and the sand.  We'll stay off the hill to let it recover from the recent rain/snow.

ThNR - 8:00 at my place.

Road Bike Party

Ever if the bike makes a better rider?  Well check out what Martyn Ashton can do with a $16,000  Pinarello road bike...

Beach Cross Photo Dump

Another gaggle of good times at the beach thanks to the fine folks at OCC.  The Altona contingent thanks you for a great day.

ThNR Report

It was a dark and stormy night.  Some thought it was a good idea to cycle, others knew it was a terrible idea.  Everybody did what they wanted and everybody was happy, except for pastor Dan who didn’t read the blog, showed up late and rode alone in the rain.  Poor, poor Dan.  The keeners were Steven, Gavin, Curt and Albert.  The sensible crowd was James, David, Shaun, Duke and myself.  We were eventually joined at the clubhouse by the keeners and soggy Dan where minutes include: the weather better get better, Shaun has sweet new Easton wheels, Paul B’s trailer is like sleeping on a ship, Athena Dyck wraps, the new ABES bank account, old-school threat: I’m going to sell you kids to the Indians, Altona CU Money-pit and the Rosenort CU Sky lift, Shaun is anti other-people, Dan misses the Manitoba Moose (the non-alcoholic beer of hockey), James wore a plastic bag to keep the rain off his head - which is cheap and effective - just like James, Young and foolish is eventually replaced with Old and stupid, Gavin had 4 wisdom teeth pulled out for $80 and a bottle of rye, and Paul Krahn reports on his Menno Cross incident on his blog – Douchious Maximus.  Good times.  JS

Wet, cold and loving it?

James taking care of his jerri curls

Thursday Night Cross Lab and Ride

Cross Lab - show up and practice if you want to.  I'll be at home not being outside.

ThNR - a motion was made to move all future ThNRs to 8:00.  The motion passed - effective today.  The time of upcoming Thursday Night Rides will be 8:00.  I'll see you at 8:00 for the ThNR.  I'm looking at the pastors - you got it right?  8:00.

I vote for a short ride, maybe the shortest ride possible.

Brothers and sisters are you ready?

Gavin worked his magic and shows us how to ride the course at Southern Cross.  You can also expect the return of the ABES Six-Pack, the whirl and a ditch of water.  It's going to be a gooder!