Tour de Rhineland Report

Rank	Rider	Time	Place	Bonus	Final
1	Paul	58:34	2	7:00	51:34
2	Bruce	58:24	1	6:30	51:54
3	Johnny	1:00:07	3	6:30	53:37
4	Charles	1:04:29	4	9:00	55:29
5	Albert	1:07:10	7	8:00	59:10
6	Shawn	1:04:35	5	5:00	59:35
7	Myron	1:06:11	6	5:00	1:01:11
8	David	1:12:06	9	5:30	1:06:36
9	Tom	1:10:59	8	4:00	1:06:59
10	Steve	1:15:22	10	8:00	1:07:22
11	James	1:21:07	11	8:00	1:13:07

From the desk of race coordinator Dan...

The weather was iffy all day but conditions turned favorable for a race to remember! The air was think with anticipation at the start gate - one minute of unadulterated anxiety greeted each rider as they took the stall. (was that Bordeaux Cherry or Heavenly Hash?) The trivia proved more difficult than a fifth grade Social Studies test with some riders opting to forgo the 1 minute bonus trusting in their brawn rather than their brain. At the half way point a little refreshment of dogs and ice-cream were a welcome sight. Those who pushed themselves on the trail had a harder time consuming, while those who opted for a more refined pace on the course had the option of eating like a pig or a duck or what ever kind of animal that eats without chewing much. Back on the trail with the wind on the back the pace quickened for most. The red cooler came into view soon than expected. The option of two pops (with or without the wobbly) was an added touch that was for naught as all participants chose wobbly pop as the beverage of refreshment. For some, the consumption of dogs, ice-cream and beer couple with and over achieving attitude caused the body to reject the afore mentioned goodies as a pink froth. (Well done Johnny!) While others, who, shall we say, have more realistic expectations of themselves chose to sit on the camp stool enjoying two of this countries finest moments; a beverage made from the best goods of the grassland parries combined with the crisp waters of the Rockies, and a glorious big-sky sunset. you just don’t get that on the Russian Steppes. The finish line held much excitements and anticipation as the riders came in. Bruce had the best time with Paul a close second. But in the end, Bruce’s lack of confidence in his Aviation knowledge cost him first place and a lead of 10 seconds tuned into a 20 second, second place finish behind Paul. If there is a lesson to be learned from this event it would be either 1) don’t ride to close behind Johnny after he has had Bordeaux Cherry Deluxe or 2) don’t fly with Bruce to YWG (Winnipeg) or you might end up at WWG (Prairie View).

Thanks for the report Dan.  That was a great race.  Part time trial, part alley cat, part food, part beer, part bs.  All good.  We should do that again.  Congratulations Paul.  I know you needed to win some cash before the CMU mafia come to bust up your knee cap  - again.  We know what really happened the first time DB.  Shaun eventually won the cash in the draw prize.  Shaun spread the love with rounds of beef jerky - nice move Shaun.  

We were joined at the clubhouse by No-Show, Scheisse, Jeff, and a dapper Paul B.  Clubhouse Minutes include: the bridge repair delay on hwy 306 is frog related, crappy/insulting service awards gifts, the Enbridge oops, Justin's naughty Boa, the incredible/crazy X Games, ABES jersey and logo, the Icelandic soccer team's fishy celebration, Paul's bromantic bike ride with the FGBC, car-off: '94 tempo (low k's, cherry) V '87 Le Sabre, Vegas - wolf pack of one, The Jeffersons or The Jetsons?, bourbon + mushrooms = mistakes, St. Jean poutine-fest, Paul B's Neil Young concert review - some hits, some misses, overenthusiastic fans.  Paul bought me some apple pie for my birthday - 40 fricken years old baby!  Stupid.  I love it.  

Bruce had two upcoming rides to announce: 

1) August 14 - bike to Moose Lake - steak, sleep, get kicked out.  

2) August 26 - Thursday Night at the Races - M.S. Fundraiser at Bruce's place, cross race, supper, prizes, family fun, good cause, good times.

JS