Friday, April 18, 2014

Maundy Thursday Race Report

DSwank organized a maundy/easter themed race for a small group of regulars.  Shaun, Paul, Franklin and I rode together until Franklin, aka Judas, sprinted to the clubhouse to have his feet washed by Mr. Pioneer Meat - for the win.  Well done Franky you beautiful backstabbing bastard.  Duke, Dan, James and Lyle joined us at clubhouse where Duke insists he told a student to turn off their pants, cx rules, races and bikes were bandied, Paul was nominated to be the Saturday morning road ride coordinator, "by just 4 points" BS, ABES 5th anniversary coffee table book, Lyle is expecting a baby and has a beautiful glow, we were serenaded by teenaged boys, Cuyuna attendance is hovering at 30 people (right arm!), David can't take a hint and totes ma goats.  The post clubhouse party was in Lyle's garage where we saw a lot of pretty bikes and drank Franklin's winnings.

Last weekend team ABES, consisting of David, James, Myron, Shaun, Tom, Franklin, Paul, and I competed at the West Park School Quiz Night Fundraiser.  We flexed our collective big brains to dominate the 36 team field.  In the end it was ABES MVP Stompin' Tom Dueck that let our team to victory.  We are officially the smartest of the smrt.  Yaa teamwork!

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Hippy Trails

Albert is in Moab today.  He sent these to make us jealous.  Well done Albert.

Tuesday, April 15, 2014


That's right ABES!  Get your Easter/Passover groove on with the Maundy Thursday Alleycat race!  As usual you'll need your bike, a light, a pen, but also a photo-taking device (such as a phone or digital camera, film camera unacceptable).  Entry fee is $5 CDN or 8 Shekels.  Meet at 8 PM at HQ and make Good Friday a GREAT Friday with an awesome Thursday!

NOTE:  We'll also be discussing this years CX news.  Come for the explanations and discussion.  And of course the BS.

Saturday, April 12, 2014

Italy Ride Report

Paul submitted this

I've attached a selfie of me, and the bike I rode, and the beer I drank in Florence (in Piazza de Signoria) after the ride.  Give a shout out to as a great little bike shop with super helpful staff (maps & routes), good bikes, and reasonable rates.

That looks awesome.  We're not jealous at all jerk face.  Thanks for the report Paul.

Wednesday, April 9, 2014

Thursday Night Ride

This is how I feel every time I race.  Lately, this is how I feel every time I ride my bike.  It's time for me to ride my bike more often.  See you at 8.  

Thursday, April 3, 2014


It's on! 8 PM tonight. JS won't be there but ride and do the usual. Have fun!

Wednesday, March 26, 2014


Last week Franklin led bicycle games and races that had the perfect blend of complicated scoring and indiscriminate rules.  It was great.  Thanks Franky.

Congrats DB
See you at 8 and we'll see what shakes out of the ABES tree.

SAVE THE DATE…Family camping and biking on the Canada day long weekend at the  Cuyuna Trails.  All y'all are invited.  Carve out your family fun time while the carving is good.

Wednesday, March 19, 2014


Franklin was going to plan an evening of races and bike skills.
But maybe he didn't.
See you at 8.

Friday, March 14, 2014

ThNR Report

David, Shaun, James, Evan and I zipped around town on a beautiful night.  We appreciated the fact that the weather didn’t hurt us.  The pace was good but eventually the clubhouse was calling and we succumbed.  We were joined by Duke, Tom, Franklin, Paul and Dan.  Paul was nervous about leaving his brand spanking new steel 29’er in the back of his truck, so he brought it inside and we all oohed and awed appropriately.  Minutes include: the jump to conclusions mat, Franklin started the “Let’s be Honest” campaign, David is obsessed with the missing Malaysian airline and the conspiracy theories,  Canola Fest V Rape Fest, Jerry Loeppky ran into a Maple Leaf Menno in Los Angeles, cloudy with a chance of making stuff up, assumptions = making an Ass out of U and Mptions, upcoming long-weekend cycling schedule: July – Cuyuna, August– Maah Daah Hey, September– Riding mountain, journaling and crafting for university credits, D is for degree, rocking out at our age is still cool – but not during the week, Got Shmaunt Fat?, race director Franklin is planning a three-pronged race for next Thursday, and the quote of the night, “Not working is part of the job.”  Good times.
Jerr-balls and James Reimer

Bruce and Paul work on the new steel steed before the ThNR.

Race photos - Bruce and Ben returned to the ACC in record time.  Bruce received extra bonus points for sledding on his bike.  Here are some pics from The Killer B’s

Well done boys.

Thursday, March 13, 2014


It was cool to see those dudes shovelling and snow blowing at The Bridge on Sunday.

Enjoy this playful video.

The Thursday night ride dudes are pretty cool too.
See you at 8.

Wednesday, March 12, 2014

Race Pics

Marguerite and Cheryl made a fine race duo.  I'm not sure what they were doing but it looked like they had a good time doing it.  

Shots of Goldschlagger

clubhouse knockdown games.
good helping

The goldschlagger must be kicking in.

Is this the helping or illegal picture

So good!
bonus points for chips

Why not.
Excuse me, sir?

That's a good deal.

They DQ'd but kind of won the race.  
Well done ladies.

Monday, March 10, 2014

AWBR Remembered

What a beautiful day for a bike ride - good friends, bikey fun, and food I didn't have to prepare.  So much goodness.  We should do that again!

Here are some pics from David and I, and a sampling from teams Joanne/Cindy and David/Shaun.

A good turnout at the ACC
Everybody was eager to play outside

Knockdown games

David may have been crowned world champion of the world,
but James is the local feared beard of knockdowns
Everybody loves to see a crash
Franklin disappointed

Cindy goes "Wrecking Ball" on the ox

Joanne! Are you OK?
bonus points for the spewing blood

Shaun shows his respect
Who's a good boy?

Thanks to Gavin for generously taking care of the kids and to Dan for picking up the pizza and to both of them for working the technology.  Also, Bruce / Back Alley Cycle surprised us by donating some bike schwag for prizes - thanks Bruce.  Good times.

More photos of the race will be posted soon.  I am accepting bribes for preferential editing.  JS 

Saturday, March 8, 2014

ThNR Report

Franklin, David, James, Albert, Shaun and I met, as is our way.  James broke his chain cycling up my driveway so Franklin took him home for repairs and the rest of us watched the rest of the Jets game in the basement.  We re-gathered and took to the snowy streets to swerve and swing about.  David was taking bets as to who would fall first.  As karma would have it, he had a beautiful belly-flop during a game of knock down.  Tom found us and we continued on until James broke his chain again.  He and Tom trudged to the clubhouse and the rest of us made our way to the park paths and a quick race.  Of the 5 remaining cyclists, Franklin destroyed the competition and there were two DQ’s and a dozen take-downs.  We retired to the clubhouse where Dan and Duke had found the ABES walkers.  Minutes include: Albert shared pictures of his LA/Arizona cycling trip and told us of their unaware reservations at a nude spa (sure), Shaun was enjoying his sports related tourettes, no beard = the facial Brazilian, we voted and passed a motion to spend our meat money on a smoker, we were gearing up for our ABES team trivia night, clubhouse bathroom graffiti developments are improving, Oh those Russians, Gavin’s back is f’d, “Man, I feel like a woman” DS, 80’s Metallica V Hall and Oates, PK curls the dead rock, CBC sports sucks arse, Sunday night Brier finals, Dan orders pizza without cheese = breadsticks, Paul Anka sings Jump by Van Halen, and then we all shared our feelings.  Good times.

We'll meet at the Curling club this Sunday at 2:30 for an afternoon of winter cycling goodness.  Bring a camera for the Ride and Go Seek Photo Scavenger Hunt.  Gimpy Gavin has agreed to tend the tots.  See you there!  JS

Wednesday, March 5, 2014


Let's ride bike.

See you at 8.  

Friday, February 28, 2014

ThNR Report

Wind chill warnings were in full effect for James, Franklin and I but we bravely/foolishly cycled anyway.  We rode a lap around town and retired to the clubhouse where we watched the Jets win a shootout over the Coyotes.  We were joined by DSwat where Minutes include: Franklin bet against the Jets again (thanks for the beer), the clubhouse graffiti improvement project is in effect – a pen(is) necessary for urination, The Altona Cigarette Enthusiast Society – GO ACES, lose weight with AIDS!, it was confirmed that James was wearing a helmet and Shaun can buy a new mountain bike, memories of Officer Sexy, Mr. F. Yu owns it, Shaun Turtle Waxes his bike, enter the FGBC Spring Classics Pool for vicarious racing fun and fame, ABES headquarters will go on sale in 2015, wear sunscreen, Shaun loudly announced to our waitress that he loves caulk, Obama is making iron man, and Franklin traded a Jets ticket for Shauns bike.  Good times.

The ABES Winter Bike Race is gearing up - more details will come as the weekend approaches.  If you'd like to lend a hand, I could use a volunteer pizza picker upper - let me know if you can help.  So far, Franklin, Stephanie, Sweet Cheryl Koop and I are the only ones that have committed to the race.  Please RSVP if you plan to attend.  If you forget to respond, you will get a kick in the arse that will be delivered with great enthusiasm!

BAC News - Starting March 4, the newly renovated Back Alley Cycle will return to their non-winter hours: Tuesday to Friday, 2:00-6:00 and Saturday, 10:00-3:00.  Check'em out

Thursday, February 27, 2014


This winter sucks the bag.

Bikes and Jets at 8.

Tuesday, February 25, 2014

Arizona Report

Albert has submitted some pics from his bike trip.  Highlights include drifting sand (v snow), eating crab legs and world famous pie, warmer weather and more tail-winds than last year, 830 kms of touring, and not sleeping beside a toilet.

Only 2 flats - not bad.

Bicycle license plate from Winnipeg

The last stop.  Well done boys.
Thanks for the updates Albert.  We heart you.